Game of Intelligence

A blonde chick found herself sitting next to a lawyer on an airplane. Bored, the lawyer kept bugging the blonde wanting her to play a game of intelligence (lawyers like easy prey). Finally, the lawyer offered her 10 to 1 odds, said every time the blonde could not answer one of his questions she owed him $5, but every time he could not answer hers he’d give her $50.00. The lawyer figured he could not lose, and the blonde reluctantly accepted.

The lawyer first asked, “What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?” Without saying a word the blonde handed him $5.

The blonde then asked, “What goes up a hill with 3 legs and comes back down the hill with 4 legs?”

The lawyer looked puzzled. He spent nearly an hour, looking up everything he could on his laptop and even placing numerous air-to-ground phone calls, trying to find the answer. Finally, angry and frustrated, he gave up and paid the blonde $50.00

The blonde put the $50 into her purse without comment, but the lawyer insisted, “What is the answer to your question?”
Without saying a word, the blonde handed him $5.

Krazzy Binocular Soccer

Need Good Points then take care of your WIFE

How to take care of your wife:

In the world, one single rule applies to the men: Make the Woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that's the way the game is played.

Here is a guide to the point system:

SIMPLE DUTIES

• You make the bed (+1)


• You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow (0)


• You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)


• You go out to buy her what she wants (+5)


• In the rain (+8)


• But return with Beer (-5)


• You check out a suspicious noise at night (0)


• You check out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing (0)


• You check out a suspicious noise and it is something (+5)


• You pummel it with iron rod (+10)


• It's her pet (-10)

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS

• You stay by her side the entire party (0)


• You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college buddy (-2)


• Named Tina (-4)


• Tina is a dancer (-10)

HER BIRTHDAY

• You take her out to dinner (0)


• You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar (+1)


• Okay, it's a sports bar (-2)


• And it's all-you-can- eat night (-3)


• It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can- eat night, and your face is painted the colours of your favourite team (-10)

A NIGHT OUT

• You take her to a movie (+2)


• You take her to a movie she likes (+4)


• You take her to a movie you hate (+6)


• You take her to a movie you like (-2)


• It's called 'DeathCop' (-3)


• You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans (-15)

YOUR PHYSIQUE

• You develop a noticeable potbelly (-15)


• You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it (+10)


• You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts (-30)


• You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one too." (-8000)

ENJOY THE 'BIG' QUESTION

• She asks, "Do I look fat?" (-5) [Yes, you LOSE points no matter WHAT]


• You hesitate in responding (-10)


• You reply, "Where?" (-35)


• Any other response (-20)

COMMUNICATION

• When she wants to talk about a problem , you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned _____expression (0)


• You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50)


• You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+500)


• She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep (-10000)